


Cloudy Skies and Ruthless Thoughts

by PsyenceFiction



Series: Anonymously Requested [2]
Category: David Bowie (Musician)
Genre: Depression, Flooding, Gen, New York City, Storms, Suicide, Thunder and Lightning
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-09-21
Updated: 2017-08-23
Packaged: 2018-04-22 18:59:26
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 6
Words: 12,616
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4846667
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/PsyenceFiction/pseuds/PsyenceFiction
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>
  <i>Featuring David Bowie at one of the lower draughts of his life, swallowed up in a mental abyss. All he needs is an anchor, will someone throw it?</i>
</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Should I Stay or Should I Go?

**Author's Note:**

> **  
> _Requested Fiction_  
>  **
> 
>  
> 
> _Contains Depressive Themes and Suicide Reference_

A bolt of lightening tore through the fabric of the foggy night sky, sheets of rain slicing through the soggy skies. Thor awakened. Trees bending and cowering in the hurricane like wind. Traffic was on standstill, horns honking and cars skidding around the flooded roads echoed across the city. The roads on the outskirts were dense with collecting muddy water, closed off to public now by traffic wardens and hazard safety crews. The worst storm New York had experienced in a decade. 

Amaris clogged along through the sour bitter winds, lucky enough to take the morning weather reports seriously and pack her weather proof- or so the stores pitches boasted- clothes. She’d just left work for the evening, a fairly normal and somewhat dull job but it got her by, paid the bills, put food on the table and kept a roof over her head; that’s all she needed right? 

Over her brown and grey office like attire she wore waterproofed slacks, wellington boots and a well insulated winter’s jacket. Along with a hood she kept strapped up tight. Cracks and whips lit the angry skies like fireworks, only more frightening, more realistically fear-wrenching for the dwellers of New York city. She clutched up her handbag and trod on, avoiding the more serenly misleading puddles and jumping over abyss like ones collecting in the shoddy pavements. The government never paid for new roads to be laid, no money came out of their pocket for the safety of all residents, especially in this weather where the most innocent of puddles could in fact be a bottomless pit of grit and grime, maybe a dead rat if that someone was unfortunate enough. 

“Goodness me.” Amaris cowered, tredding carefully again and making her usual journey home yet it felt more like she was starring in an indiana jones movie with the energy leeching adventure it was. Up ahead was the old abandonned bridge. The marker that she was half way there and a pinnacle of hope for this dreadful day. She feared for her life the whole way, for what took usually ten minutes had already amounted to at least thirty slow stepping minutes. 

\- 

David looked up at the crackling skies with a somber tasteless expression, hands behind him gripping onto the eroding weak stone on the bridge. The only handle he had left from the needless to say fatal drop. His car was parked up on the kirb, hazard lights on and a note in the windshield explaining it’s being; although it’d probably flown away or died into nothing more than a pile of white mush by now. 

His attire was completely inappropriate for the sudden outbreak but he wasn’t a mind likely to follow others warnings. Danger and rebellious attitude were his lifestyle, telling him not to push the red button meant he almost certainly would. His tie flapped around along with the wind, drenched from head to toe however his soaked body didn’t break out a single shiver, already numbed with adrenaline at the fate that lied below his heels. 

The way the skies broke out the moment he climbed down onto the ledge felt like a sign. That maybe somebody up there was listening, watching him now and shouting he turn back. But how could he? He’d gotten so far, all it took was one step and a loosen of his finger tips and he’d be relieved of every tonne hanging on his shoulders. Another flash shocked his eyes, his heart thudded as he looked down at the traffic flowing below on the four wide highway. His shirt stuck to his chest, his favourite one. Salmon pink with a grey pinstripe, grey suit pants matching. All dressed for his last work assignment, his final piece. 

\- 

Amaris started to side step onto the cobble paving the high bridge. A car up ahead blinking it’s bright orange hazard lights caught her attention. Maybe if she was particularly sweet and found the right stranger there she could ask a ride. She stepped closer one foot in front of the other, rumagging through her tiny handbag hung over her broad shoulder. Just like her mother, she had one stronger shoulder, a very handy woman trait to have just for her bag, it never slipped off. 

Her hands touched at her purse and she pulled it out, about to approach the car. With the blizzard of heavy droplets of rain pattering down she couldn’t see through the windscreen before she got there. But when she did she was surprised to find nothing but an empty car, engine still running and keys still in. The doors were unlocked.. was this a gift from the angry gods above? She got her balance against the car, then noticing a handwritten note drenched but readable tucked into the windscreen wipers. She dared to pull it out and read the lyrical type note, a riddle? Whomever owned this car sure knew how navigate the English language. It was written more like a modern work of shakespeare than a simple note. But it mentioned the same theme simultaenously. Maybe that was the key to it all, the pattern she was supposed to notice. Death. 

_Mortality. Death. Die. Suicide._ Those four words were written in italic. Amaris worried over this obviously troubled mind, looking around everywhere. She could hear the faint rustling of feet nearby and then she noticed a pair of hands, fingertips hanging on the ledge beside her. “Oh no.” 

Amaris approached the side and looked down. There he stood. This must’ve been the owner. A handsome bloke that’d been reduced to a walking puddle in the storm, his face and fingers were turning a slight shade of blue. She guessed he’d been out here a while now. Her thoughts diverted to find the best way to let him know she was hear without scaring him so much he let go. She gently took up her knees and dared lean over the edge, making her padded belly flat and looking down at him hanging from the ancient engraved and from her depiction Victorian edges of the bridge. 

His eyes shon with unshed tears, but his face was streaked with lined where some had obviously managed to escape. The depression, hurt on his face disturbed her. No one should ever reach this point, everyone with the mental instability needed a warm helping hand she believed. “Don’t.” She saw him start to wiggle his fingers slightly, the moment of new beginning and he did very nearly jump with surprise rather than willingly step off. 

He looked up with his dulled mismatched eyes sadly, why he listened to her was besides him. He didn’t question it. As much as he was about to take the leap, he listened to what she had to say instinctively. Something buried among the clouds nesting in his own mind was begging him not to, her words escalated that. 

“The hope, the life, it’s beautiful.” He whispered as he looked down at the traffic rushing by again. So many drivers could see him, oh the faith in humanity she had just walked itself away at that point. 

“You wish it was.” Amaris whispered back, edging her hand closer to his finger tips. She was a burly and tough woman like her mother, strong enough to yank this man up easily. 

“I know it is.” He said bitterly, his foot wavering off. 

“It’s not worth it. Your family, your life. That’s worth much more than those cars.” She replied softly, she’d never had to talk someone out of this before and she just hoped she was twisting the right cords now. 

“How would you know. I have no family left.. life? That’s worth less to me than a penny chew.” 

“Now you’re just talking out your arse uh-” She looked down over the note scrunched in her other hand, “David..” Then it clicked and she gasped and almost fell off herself in shock. 

“David as in.. I’d recognise those eyes anywhere. David Bowie.” Amaris liked his music a lot, no wonder she immediately recognised him as the handsome fella. 

“You think?” He ignored her eureka moment, looking back down at the traffic and treading closer. 

“No. David please, this isn’t you. You’re an absolute.. an absolute wonder of a person, the world needs men like you. Gentle and sweet, hardworking and fabulous. Oh my god I can’t let you do this..” She panicked a bit discovering it wasn’t only a man stood over the edge of a bridge but David Bowie. 

A louder crack erupted from the sky and struck a tree only yards from them at the side of the road, it split and fell down immediately, tumbling down the hill and cars skidded around, going straight into the right hand lane to avoid the debris flying down onto the highway right below him. He frowned at the strange phenomenon and sighed, closing his eyes and starting to let his fingers slip away. 

Amaris grabbed his hand suddenly and he hung against the wall on his back, breathing heavily as he’d almost fallen if it wasn’t for her hand. Not that it mattered when she grabbed it in his dark disturbed mind. He’d had enough, why wouldn’t she just move on and let him go. 

“It’s not worth it hun, it really isn’t. You have so so much more to live for than you’re thinking right now.” She told him, holding onto his hand tightly as he tried to wrestle it out and almost slipped a second time. His other hand tapped back at the ledge and held on and leaned back from the very edge towards her. 

“You have so much more to offer this world.. than many men I know. Please. Don’t do this, think about all the people in this world that will mourn, people that may take their own lives for yours.” She had to try a little harsh to get through to him, he felt like he deserved it anyway so he just nodded tiredly and gulped his eyes set on the road. 

“I’m old and frail, I’m losing my shine now. I doubt anyone remembers my name.” He shrugged, taking a step towards the edge again. She let go of his hand when he had it firmly pressed to the ledge behind him again, his gaze pointed over the horizon. From here there was a perfect view of New York, a mixture of taller buildings and the blur of lights. Trees bordering over the top further away at the edge of the city. She could see why he’d chosen this spot, the most beautiful focal point to take in before whatever he planned to do. 

“No you’re not. Please come away from the edge David, please.” She pleaded with him, tears starting to form in her wide fearful eyes. She never dreamed she’d be in this position with David Bowie of all people. “I’m only twenty two. I know you’re name, it’s everywhere. You’re a worldwide superstar, a hero and a musical genius. So many people love you more than they love themselves, I can guarantee that.” 

“Then they’ll love me no matter what right?” David sighed tiredly, hanging his head over the edge sadly and closing his eyes again. 

“If you do this, then I will too.” Amaris wasn’t the best person to be here trying to stop him, she tried her own methods on because there was no other way she could think to do this. She crawled up and swung her legs over, shaking from head to toe. She really wasn’t a fan of heights but she couldn’t go back on her word if it meant his life in tact. Her feet landed down on the edge and she gripped the ledge, one of his hand swung down and then she took it with one of her own. 

“No you won’t stop-stop it..” He said nervously, looking up at her with his shiny eyes as she climbed down and took his hand in her own. 

“Ready?” She braved up, would he take her with him?


	2. Thou Shalt Not Kill

A wicked crackle struck a field nearby again, like the clouds themselves were closing in on the two. By now a few cars had parked illegally on the edge of the roadside, shouting their very loudest and waving their hands above their head at the two stood on the daunting edge of the bridge. The structure was so ancient she was surprised the foundation beneath their feet hadn’t gave way by now and made the choice for him. It crackled everytime they moved and little crumbles of eroded pebbles fell down from just in front of the tips of their shoes. 

The shouting was faint but they noticed it, he didn’t look at them and she did. Waving back with one hand she could spare. It looked so bad, from there it probably looked like they were both ready to jump together when really she was trying to talk him out of it. She wouldn’t dare leave him a second, or turn her back. A courageous soul like her and also a gentle caring one that knew what was right to do and what wasn’t. She’d never forgive herself for walking past a suicidal man and giving him no second glance, she had to help even if it now meant risking her own life and putting their fate into his hands. She hoped it would will him down from it so she could get him dried and warm and talk to him less pathetically and more as a human, where they could actually hear each other properly. 

“Well?” Amaris looked over the edge with the shakes kicking in, her knees wobbling and her body trembling to this pressure. David was too polite too nice a gentleman, he wouldn’t would he? 

“Leave me be.” He whined to her, his tie flapping against his face and annoying him. 

“No. Either together or not at all, it’ll scar me for life seeing a person take their own life.” She was stubborn but enough so that was reasonable in this predicament. Amaris dealt with it in her own way, more scared than she willed to admit aloud. He seemed so fearless yet so sad, he looked down as if the sight of death below him was almost pleasurable to gaze upon. She felt tears running down her cheeks now, he looked between her and the traffics and then the people finally and started to well up again, sobbing grossly. 

“Come here, c'mon.” She wanted to comfort him so much, hold him in her arms and heal him of his ill thoughts. His chest heaved as he let out his tension in agressive sobs and she took him into her arm spare and let him press his face against her chest. 

“Let me help you David. Let me help..” Amaris spoke against his ear, stroking his soggy hair despite how matted and untended it felt. 

He eventually stopped and just ended up sniffling and taking in hitched breaths every few seconds, gripping onto her for his dear life now. Surely that was a good sign? 

“O-o.. okay.” He finally agreed, almost starting to sob again. Amaris took his answer immediately, the spectators seem to have noticed she was in fact helping him and she waved once at them. 

“Hold on to this, here.” She placed his hands back against the ledge slowly and bravely scaled up to the higher safer ledge, leaning back off on her front and taking his hands. 

“One, two, three.” She counted for his sake so he’d not jump out of his skin when she pulled him up strongly, glad her strength was finally useful. Lifting paperclips and staplers in the office was no way to use it that was for sure. He was hoisted up and scrambled up. Getting off of the ledge immediately and landing back on the pavement. 

Amaris felt such relief finally wash over her at that point, he patted at his jacket tiredly and shook out his hair as much as he could. It was overgrown, a beard on his face and his eyes baggy and tired. He looked his age now, it hurt her so much because she knew he always looked younger usually. 

She climbed down and stood beside him, seeing his shaking cold hands trying to find his keys. He’d obviously made this trip so suddenly that he’d forgotten they were in the ignition for the next lucky passer by to find. Luckily everyone sane was indoors shying away from the storm. She took his grubby hand and led him round to the passenger side, opening the door for him and huddling him inside. 

“Let me drive, you’re in no state to.” Amaris told him as he looked up at her confusedly, nodding weakly in agreement when she explained. She shut the door and went round to the drivers side, sitting down in the seat and closing the door. The car was refreshingly warm, she took off her jacket and sighed with relief as the warm air hit her, starting the engine again and taking off for a drive, wherever. Just to keep his mind from wandering back to the recent thoughts. 

She turned on his car radio, it instantly started to play his favourite station. A Lennon song came on and his shoulders seemed to relax, his body calming from the shakes and shudders mostly at the warm air covering him and heating him up bit by bit. Amaris was tempted to take him to the hospital, not for his depression but in case he was hyperthermic but she knew the signs and he hadn’t passed out at being reintroduced to heat so she kept a close eye on him and took a few turns. 

“Do you have any spare clothes?” Amaris asked, a funny question but he raised his brows and nodded once. Maybe he wasn’t so desperate to take his life after all, he needed somebody to look after him was all. 

“Yeah.. For work but.” That made more sense, probably more formal clothes but he needed some in his sopping state. He couldn’t remain wet for much longer or he would get terribly ill. 

Amaris pulled in at a local twenty four hour coffee shop and turned off the engine turning to him. “Get them out, change in the bathroom. I have a small towel somewhere in here.” She rumagged through her work bag, pulling out a hand towel. 

“I knew it was going to be dreadful weather, brought it in case.” She shrugged when he seemed to look at her peculiarly. What did she work as, a lifeguard? He guessed aimlessly, his mind wasn’t really working all too well right now. Pretty much blanked out, staring into nothing mostly. 

David got out of the car slowly, stretching his body out and hobbling over to the trunk. He got out his briefcase with the spare clothes and shut the boot again. Amaris locked his car and kept hold of the keys for now, he wasn’t doing a runner yet. She waited for him and then followed behind him, going into the warm shop and being greeted by the smell of fresh coffee. He seemed to like that, his face lightened up ever so slightly. 

Amaris watched him disappear into the bathroom, sitting down at a quieter area of the shop in a corner booth but in view so he knew where she’d gotten off to, getting out her phone to tap a message to her friend. She was supposed to be meeting her after work but of course this had come up now. ‘Got caught up at work hun, I’ll meet you tomorrow.’ Friday was a day of rejoice she had no plans tomorrow anyway. 

David emerged from the bathroom after quite some time, hair combed and slicked back a bit more formally to suit his outfit. He was mostly dried up now, his hair still damp in parts but better. He was wearing a grey pinstripe suit, pink tie and brown crocodile skin shoes. He came over and sat down in front of her, he looked to be slightly better now warmer and in company of somebody. 

“Coffee? Food?” She offered warmly, passing him the menu and waving over a waitress. 

“Yes. Can I have a Mocha and Churros please.” Amaris ordered, maybe she shouldn’t have donuts before she’d even had dinner but they didn’t serve any real food here. And she was still starving. 

“Um. Americano, black, four sugars. Churros too please.” He muttered quietly, keeping his head in the menu mostly, only looking up at the waitress once. His eyes were still rather somber and saddened. The waitress must’ve noticed because she patted his shoulder before she walked off, he sighed at that and placed the menu down, fidgeting with his fingers and tapping his feet. 

“So, tell me about yourself.” He spoke softly, looking up at her now less nervously and held his hands on the table. 

“Oh. I’m Amaris, I’m twenty two, nothing special.” She blushed when his intense mismatched eyes fell upon her, she realised she hadn’t properly introduced herself. 

“There must be something special about you, like that smile.” He said innocently, raising his brows. 

“Well. I work a dead beat job at an office, my only real friend is my cat and I watch games shows. That’s it really.” She smiled when he mentioned it, he picked up upon small detail clearly, she’d only smiled once this whole time and that’s when he started to hum to Lennon in the car. She hadn’t even noticed him looking at her but with his tense, edgy tendencies at the moment she was sure he preferred it that way. 

“That’s not so bad. I like animals too, I’ve had many in my life. My cat ran away last time, I can see why.” He shrugged, rumagging through his pocket for his smokes. He pulled them out and then a lighter on top, figeting for one. 

“I thought you gave up those, _things.._ ” She frowned, she wasn’t overly invested in him but she knew he’d given up at some point. 

“So. I need one now. I’ve heard the lecture a thousand times, please.” He saw that look in her eyes suddenly and caught it quickly, he’d rather not listen to a lecture right now. He’d not given up for long, a year maybe. He was back on them but his radio silence meant no one really knew or probably didn’t give a damn if he did anyway. 

“Ah.” She understood, maybe not for the little death sticks within but maybe the stress relief. Different strokes for different folks, she told herself…


	3. Coffee & Donuts

Click. David fidgeted with the lighter slipping in his fingers, frowning and clicking away, a cigarette sitting between his lips loosely, ready for a non-apparent flame. Amaris watched him endlessly click and clack at the lighter with no luck and looked thoughtful, “Here.” She rummaged through her heavy, crammed handbag and produced a different lighter, still full to the brim with fuel and working as far as she knew. He hesitantly put the useless plastic scrap back in his pocket and reached for the offered tool, taking it up and quickly lighting the end of his smoke with one successful flick of his thumb, inhaling and exhaling deeply every time he took a drag, consecutively. 

“Why do you have a lighter?” He asked quietly, gazing from the window, avoiding anyone’s glances although the thought of them brought the anxiety of a burning feeling on the back of his neck. The gloomy outside skies reeking havoc upon New York, he fixated upon expressionlessly. 

“Candles, incense sticks.” Amaris explained, not taking the lighter when he held it out to her. “Keep it.” She knew he’d need it if he was about to go on a smoking spree which was looking to be the case as he dissolved the first cigarette rather rapidly, his stress for the soothing nicotine apparent. She couldn’t blame him, nor would she, treading lightly around him in his unstable head, he didn’t need anymore negativity right now and she wasn’t about to throw any upon him.

“Ah.” David tried but he didn’t sound overly surprised or fussed by her answer, she again didn’t expect him to be giving her five star hospitality right now, she’d just dragged him from the edge of a bridge, suicide on the tip of his tongue. Pairs of eyes were in fact upon them, but it wasn’t too packed in the cafe, the storm overhead deterring people indoors and mostly truckers about the twenty four hour roadstop probably only here to sensibly avoid driving weighty tankers in such dreadful condition. 

“One Americano, one black.” The cheery waitress came strolling back over with a serving tray balanced on her arm, another with hot churros and melted chocolate dip on two tea plates, on top of greaseproof paper. She slowly and carefully settled down their order in front of them both and left them to it, going to serve another customer. A cloud of murky smoke rising rested above their table and a few others, the smell distinct to the non-smokers in the place, although Amaris must’ve been one a few with the lack of disgust on anyone else’s face and the amount of ashtrays full around. 

David rested his cigarette in his right hand fingers and picked his coffee up with his left, sipping and then gulping generously. Amaris noticed a contradictory brief flash of content on his face before it vanished, his first sip of coffee, he really did like the stuff. “These look delicious.” Amaris noted with a slight smile, pulling one of the churro plates towards her and tucking straight in, leaving her boiling steaming coffee to settle and cool a bit before she’d drink. David seemed to thrive on the scalding gulps, not even a flinch from him. 

David just stuck to his coffee for the while, sipping and gulping simultaneously until it was all gone already and he placed the cup down pushing the tea plate aside to eye his churros and hesitantly reach out for the plate. Amaris was surprised he was even up for eating right now, she sure knew what the blues felt like, maybe not as explicitly or extreme as David obviously did but she never ate properly in such a state. He’d probably already have dropped dead without habitually learning to eat while lacking appetite in moments of crushing depression, because it was quite frequent in his life.

“So?” Amaris saw him take the first bite and he had to lick the sugar grains and chocolate sauce dripping from his lips when he’d scoffed the churro, licking his fingers too. He looked up at her and she could’ve shifted a space when she saw him lightly, but politely smile in response. Whether that was just to appease her, or genuine, there was one sign of progress. Sweet treats and in nights always worked for Amaris, did they work for David too?

Together they crammed down the dessert and of all irony, David ended up with chocolate around his chops, apparently he wasn’t the cleanest eater in the world but she actually found it slightly adorable when he didn’t realise. Amaris smiled softly and took up a napkin, unfolding it and leaning over, she looked at him and when he didn’t flinch, she lightly dabbed the mess around his mouth and wiped it for him. “Thank you.” He mumbled out.

Their stay consisted of hours, talking amongst themselves and ending up grinding into quite the conversations, finding out more about one another and generally, Amaris felt proud by the time she was escorting him out of the door because he was grinning, and he seemed to have hit a higher note than he had been. The poor man. Maybe he just needed some company. Somebody to talk to. She couldn’t imagine being alone all the time, without company, she lived alone but her friends frequently went out with her or came over for nights in, watching films or having dinner, so it wasn’t like she was without social life whereas, David had explained mellowly that he didn’t usually leave the house at all, or let anyone in. He had a cook, that even then didn’t see him unless it was meal time. And a cleaner that only ever saw him when she had to hoover his office, where he nested most days, or his bedroom where he slept fitfully. They wouldn’t really have known he was quite so bad because he was so polite and well mannered with the brief conversations and interactions they had. 

“Take a right here.” David muttered, puffing on another smoke, relaxing more now, settled in the passenger seat again, being drove back home by Amaris comfortably. She’d somehow managed to soothe him to an extent, he wasn’t about to be dropped off just to walk right back out and repeat those actions, not for now, something lightened up within him when he had someone to listen to his talks about history, he felt listened to and acknowledged, a rewarding feeling he didn’t recognise but didn’t argue with when he had to smile.

Amaris took a right onto a large avenue lined with humongous houses, gated and bordered with neatly trimmed hedges, belonging to obviously, the wealthier citizens of New York. The artists and millionaires probably, but when they went up the drive to his house, she was in awe of the place and also surprised, he had so much room, but there was only him. At least five bedrooms she guessed to herself, what was all that room for? No questions, he could live however he fancied and he definitely had the bank account for it. 

“Thank you.” David offered politely once the wheels had stopped rolling and Amaris slowly parked the car up the driveway by the front door of the house, she saw a garage from the side but assumed he’d park it there later or whenever he felt, it wasn’t open and appeared electronic. 

“No problem.” Amaris was surprised when he came to lightly hug her and generously peck her cheek in a friendly fashion of appreciation, turning to get out of the car with her. He stood and Amaris tossed him the keys, keeping an eye on him on his way to the door, carefully unlocking his door. He turned his head and looked her way, “Come in.” 

David didn’t say anything more, he saw the lost look in her eyes, the shelter near his house was a blessing, but the walk home in this dreadful storm, not so much. Far from calming still, she look regrettingly on and heard him mumble to her, turning her head towards the door but he’d stepped indoors and left the door open for her. He couldn’t let her walk in that, not after what she’d done for him, he felt very giving of his appreciation, however he could spare. 

Amaris budged and stepped inside, closing the large oak door on her way in to be greeted by a large set of stairs winding at a corner into a distant hallway, another hallway of the ground floor and a door to her left, her right and ahead of her immediately. She looked around curiously and amazedly, spying the door ahead open ajar and wet footsteps leading that way, she could hear him shuffling about in there and wiped her feet first, eyeing the picture frames and art on the walls, the deep blue of walls marked with white cloudy imprints. The floor a darker mahogany to contradict the lighter walls. She hung her jacket on a peg free and removed her shoes entirely, respectful of the polished floor and his decency to invite her in. 

“Amaris?” He asked from the other room, thinking she’d not even left her original spot, he looked up from pouring a drink to gesture to the other, a glass of vintage looking rum. The kitchen area was just as spacious as the next room and the next, even the hallways bedroom sized for her customs. She gaped around and saw the flashy kitchen, marble worktops and mahogany plated cupboards. The blue and wood theme stuck wherever they went, following him into a lounge area, hugging the bottle to his chest and cupping a glass poured in the other, with ice of course.

“This place is… Stunning.” Amaris mentioned wonderingly, seeing him grunt his approval slightly and sit down in a comfortable armchair. She sat politely on a sofa near him and sipped at her drink, humming her approval when the liquor delighted her taste, it was definitely expensive and most likely, the most expensive thing that’d belong to her for a matter of hours. 

“You think?” David asked quietly, gulping unhealthily at his drink and pouring another. So he’d slipped into some habitual routines in his lone years, but she wasn’t going to mention it to him out of respect of his earlier protest, he didn’t want to be told something he knew. 

“Oh yes. The hallway is bigger than my whole apartment.” Amaris gleamed, the place was very cosy but also spacious, plastered in art, either his or one of his many in collection. He was labelled one of the biggest art collectors in England and still wore that title, constantly compulsively buying pieces, he was a massive fan of visiting galleries. “Beautiful artwork.” She commented as she looked around and he smiled slightly, in a shy fashion, he didn’t usually let people into his world and he was quite private. 

“Thankyou, a few of those are mine.” He quietly replied, he had to admit to being a little nervous with the company now but only because it’d been years since anyone other than the mailman or the workers here had entered the place. 

“Really. That’s remarkable.” Amaris complimented again, clearly enthused by the surroundings. He didn’t value the place as much as he should, because all it stored for him currently was the guilt of loneliness and bad memories of all the gloom he’d felt. Home wasn’t where his heart lied by the only place it’d beat, he didn’t move from it but he should. 

“You like art?” David wondered quietly, quite flattered by her flooding compliments, calming his first nerves for a more relaxed stance. Not everyone had such an appreciation, he had odd pieces and generally what one not in touch with such creativity as his own, an abnormal home setting, but she seemed to adore it with her curious eyes all over it. 

“Very much. I’ve been trying to get an original of Kandinsky’s for years.” Amaris mentioned, turning to face him now, feeling rude for glancing so much. He finished another drink and set his glass down, somehow he’d stopped himself from drinking himself to sleep this time. 

“Have you been to the local gallery?” David asked further, the one in his area was quite spectacular and ever changing, he visited it a lot before he became a shroud. He had no one to attend with now and going from the shy boy of Brixton to famous, he’d melted back into that boy form with no interaction in the outside world. 

“Too expensive..” Amaris blushed, tapping at her glass when she spoke, she wasn’t poor but surviving enough to buy the odd record or book when she had a dollar or two spare. He raised his brows and hesitated for a moment before he came out with it. 

“How’d you like to go? Tomorrow, with me.” David had to pull up some serious bravery in him to ask. Once the promiscuous Thin White Duke was now sat in front of a lady looking like a wannabe prom date, he didn’t hold the confidence he did have years ago on the road, making records consistently.

“I’d-I’d love to.” Amaris gasped out, almost choking on her drink in shock, she hadn’t expected that and she didn’t expect him to offer but the question lead to her fast, enthusiastic response. She’d always wanted to visit a proper gallery, the ones in her area were fascinating at times but run by the local artists and select in showings, plus expensive.

“Well. Considering the terrible weather, I’m not going to let you walk home in that.” He gestured to the window, “So you can stay in a spare room tonight, and we’ll go tomorrow morning.” He was already making plans, his slight confidence showing in announcing the plans to her but she keenly went along with whatever generosity he had to give, he was awfully polite. 

“You’re a lifesaver..” Amaris spoke without thinking, she had no filter on her brain sometimes, speaking without thinking. He chuckled softly and almost sarcastically, lightening her up from awkwardly looking away, taking nothing to heart. 

“I think that’s you.” He affirmed softly, his wounds healed quickly enough for him to surface humour about them, it was one of his coping mechanisms. He’d rather laugh it off than get all serious and offended about anything, it was unhealthy to take everything to heart and he knew it well by now, very well....


	4. Laughing Yoga

“You chose to save mine too.” Amaris muttered to him to point that fact out, she was familiar with nervous tick laughter and his was rather convincing at first but all she had to do was take one glance his way and know he was just covering up his own wounds and wrapping himself away in a gown rather than letting anyone see. It could be a rather unhealthy habit but if it stopped him dwelling on the bad and helped him focus on the good then she wasn’t going to call him out on it. Laughter was supposed to be the best remedy anyway.

“In India, they do laughing yoga right. And it makes you laugh just watching. They do all the stretches of yoga, but then, they all have to force themselves to laugh, but it starts out false, and they all end up in fits.” David mused to her, letting a fact slide, changing the subject conveniently, he did do evasive quite well, and he’d been through a lot this evening, Amaris wouldn’t make him sit it out and talk it out, it didn’t seem to be his style.

“Really?” Amaris smiles softly and nods, letting him drift away from that rightfully, he seems to have a lot of knowledge on a broad scale, going from naming and enthusiastically speaking of artists to yoga. “Maybe you should try it?” She pondered aloud, not meaning to come across in any other way than helpful and suggesting.

“I’ve always wondered whether it’d be my sort of thing. I prefer meditation.” David nods, but he seems unsure, the idea of sitting in the house alone on a rubber gym mat laughing hysterically made him feel a little crazy, his neighbours weren’t wall to wall but if they were, he could imagine them and passersby thinking him mad. His version of making a lot of noise was listening sessions and when he used to make music, playing instruments. His office door hadn’t been opened in a good matter of years, cluttered, but exactly how he would’ve left it that day where everything seemed to envelope up messily. Guitar sat at a slump against the closet door in it’s stand, various notebooks piled in the exact way he’d chucked them together, pens, art equipment, lyric book, melody book… All collecting inches of dust and maybe even cobwebs by now.

Amaris had quite a few burning questions to ask him, after all, someone of his profile. She’d never have dreamed she’d ever meet David Bowie, especially not in these circumstances, or retired in a way, he seemed to have lost himself somewhere along the way. But being the person she was, she wouldn’t rest at that now, she wanted to get to the bottom of this somehow, knowing now he had a very smartly evasive way of answering most questions, never answering them fully, or if at all, maybe replacing what should’ve been an anecdote or opinion with a question of his own. If she could, she wanted to leave him knowing he wouldn’t end up on that bridge again in a week, and this time, she may not be there so coincidentally again, so she needed to be secure in that sense, but more so for himself, this wasn’t just about her guilty conscience, about his wellbeing too.

“Meditation huh? I’ve never had the patience for it.” Amaris smirks and shakes her head, “I get there, and I can’t sit still, or I can’t clear my mind.” She explains and looks up at him to see him nodding in a level of agreement, he has a short attention span and busy mind too, and while that’s hard to harness, meditation really helps once he gets into that zone, a zen of sorts, and leaves him relaxed and rather ‘normal’ minded for a day or so, no rushing and weaving thoughts like usual. “I guess it’d work if I really put my mind to it but it’s always so busy up there.”

“God. I know that feeling.” David sighed and admitted his own difficulty with meditation. He thoroughly enjoyed it once he was there and in his element but his mood had to be just so and timing had to also be on tick or he’d never manage a mindful state. Usually his mind was buzzing and he needed to be entertained at all times, doing lots of things rather than focusing one project solely. Which is why he never settled for one art form. He loved all the arts but so did lots of musicians and actors, artists these days. Many of them did not juggle them though. David did a little spot of painting, then some writing, singing, sculpting. His art room was always in a right state because he had multiple projects in progress, all doing their own thing, being worked on at separate points. He also found it very hard to finish projects often because he had so much more to add, brainstormed enough for ten entire albums, not just one. 

Nowadays his art room was probably collecting inches of dust, he hadn’t been in there for quite some time. In fact. He could not even remember the last time he had dared turn that handle. He only ever shuffled from his bedroom, kitchen and lounge mostly. Even his office was pretty deserted. Along with whatever projects he had been once maintaining, also dropped, and forgotten about. Truthfully, he just hadn’t had the motivation, or the courage he once had, for any of it. Many had assumed he had retired, and let him move on. He appreciated that in his fanbase. Their modesty, to put two and two together and the majority, collectively coming to accurate conclusions. That he was having a break, that he was spending time to himself, that he maybe had retired however, was a false comment that was accumulating too much attention. People were spreading the word as though it was officially announced. At points he had thought it may as well have been.. hesitated with his hand hovering above the telephone, about to reach for it and dial up his representatives, make it official. What had been stopping him?

“Meditation comes in many forms though.. I find reading rather therapeutic” David waved a finger and pointed that out. Mind states that were close to entirely focused and relaxed were one of meditative states. In his library he was in his element. Ever since he was a young boy he had been reading obsessively, sometimes too much for his own good; well it depended on how you’d look at it - the knowledge gained and long term benefits could outweigh the time he sapped in his own zone, reading. It was definitely one of his favourite pastimes apart from writing. It was something that he could do lying down and find himself able to stop fidgeting and fully engage himself in without growing tired of it quickly like most other hobbies and activities he could take up. When he tried to write or make art, he ended up hovering from one to the other and not spending the extreme periods of time on that which he did when reading. It sated and calmed him like nothing else and he just thoroughly enjoyed something that either challenged or enlightened him. Knowledge was something he massed and gained in stockpile, heaps and heaps of knowledge. Whether useful or not, he knew about it and felt quite comfortable in that bubble of his. It didn't’ count for nothing when he produced his work, all little scraps of everything in between aided the process and inspired him. Which is why it was always hard to pinpoint what influenced him exactly, lots and lots of bits and bobs from everywhere, from the environment to the things he had recently learnt.

“You like books?” Amaris wondered and raised her brows, she did have a rather strong enthusiasm for it herself but nobody else around her felt the same way. Most people would rather be sat on their smartphones or glazing over at an electronic screen of some sort. It was an odd and rare sight to see someone with a book in hand nowadays, but they still existed, just in smaller, collective numbers. 

“Oh yes. Very much so. Always have.. I have a huge collection.” David lightened up when she seemed to show interest in that, getting the jist that she enjoyed reading too. He had been fond of them ever since his elder half-brother Terry had started introducing him to books along with American music. Something he was dearly fond of even to this day. His idol had been Little Richard, one of the stars of the show at that time. He grew up in the fifties, where war was still leaving its footprint on bomb shattered Brixton but culture was booming. Soon into the fifties, more cultures started to thrive in those areas and influence him too. 

“Oh those were the days..” He sighed as he remembered his childhood in thinking of what had brought him along to his now enthusiastic reading, “I remember..” He started to giggle which made her smile too, it was nice to see him brighten up, to think a hours ago… “I remember sitting up way past the hour, waiting for my parents to go to bed. I’d hear my mother climb the stairs, the door shut, and I’d sneak the radio into my room and hide under the covers, tuning into the only radio in the area that played American records to listen to Little Richard..” He told her, reflecting, sharing a small and vague memory, as from what he remembered, it had been such a long time since, he still remembered it all. 

“Cus’ you see. They didn’t like the American music. I wasn’t allowed to play it so I’d have to do it subtly.” His mind jumped quickly, from reading, to music. His attention span could and would jump from one to the next, just as quick as his thoughts flew through his quick and witty mind. But the quicker, messier minds was usually the infliction of a more intelligent mind. Sometimes it was almost too much to bare, when one needed to focus, with so much going on in their mind alone. The environment had to be calm and quiet for him to focus, otherwise he’d be more interested in… squirrel! In anything going on around him, anything passing his gaze, than what one was saying, or anything he was actually supposed to be doing. He usually enjoyed sitting by the window, in a room of his house, perhaps with some gentle low volume music on in the background, just so he didn’t go stir crazy. 

“I’d love to see your collection. I mean I can only imagine- you know your stuff.” Amaris gleamed and he nodded and shied away from any advancing compliments or statements coming. Usually he grew quite bashful if anyone said anything particularly sweet or nice to him or of him. He may mutter a quiet thank you and duck his head, but he simply did not know what to do when someone complimented him, even after all these years, going through so many people that thought the world of him and praised him. He still found praise baffling, he thought low of himself considering what he was to the world. His influence was up there with the great minds of society, and he was indeed, a legend in his own right. He just didn’t always realise it. Or he was just far too modest to let his ego within out. He certainly knew he was doing a good job, because he did put his all into his work. The fact that perfection was not seeked nor intended was something admirable in him. Many artists seeked absolute note perfection, and something they just weren’t going to grasp.


	5. Laughing Yoga

Once they started talking about their found common interest they could not stop and ended up spending the entire evening, way into early morning, right at the crack of dawn, just talking and exchanging knowledge. David had brought down books and records from his collection to show her as he felt too ashamed to show her into his messy, disorganised office space, but he showed a true enthusiasm and ended up educating her on so much of what she had been missing out on. The different time periods of the cultures and changes that she had yet to study, from the beatniks to the mods. David was definitely a mod, at heart and on an honest level with himself. In the sixties it had became a raving group with it’s own label, agenda and even fashion and David had a taster but he took the true definition with him through life actively showing enthusiasm for all things forward and advancing. Technologically and generally speaking, he had always embraced new ideas and the new kit available to beat the vast majority to crossing new borders. With his idea to livestream the making of a song, to make his own ISP and banking system, to host a website…. He’d always been ahead of time, wearing his mod title proudly. 

All he needed now was a shiny lowrider, with proper vintage handlebars and badges, all polished up, badges and all. But he had never been keen on driving, or motors too much. Ever since his accident with the car but even before then he had been iffy about driving, and with him being a London Boy and all, it was understandable. By foot or by tube was the way of transport around there. Driving was a living nightmare, with the horrendous traffic in the central capital city always busy, even at night, always ram packed. 

Eventually they had both resided to get some kip and once David had shown her to the guest room, he retreated into his own bedroom and at last, laid his head down, sighing to himself victoriously, happily? He couldn’t even remember the last time he had a reason to do that. Nothing eventful had really been happening, he’d just been wallowing in his own pity (and his own dirt with the beard he’d been growing roughly on his usually smooth face) and going nowhere with himself or his ambitions. Before it all.. he had so much planned, so much more to do, so much unfinished work. But it had all came to a halt somehow, someday, and he had never returned, motivation gone, the further he delved into the retired mindset and left the pen and pad untouched, the harder it became to return, until even his enthusiasm for that, was gone. But this whole evening, despite the terrible coincidence it was and occasion, had been something to look up to, and remember, he was still wanted, and able. It had been a reminder, and perhaps, just perhaps, what he needed to get back on track. Simply, a friend, someone to talk to, socialise with, and turn his frown upside down. Nobody else had managed it so far, or whomever had been close enough. David had been shrugging off most social calls, letters, emails, ignoring them guiltily, not knowing what to say, as people only seemed to start directly contacting him once his lacking presence had finally been noticed. He had no idea where to begin. Some of his closer handful knew, and understood, but he had guarded himself off, not allowed anyone in to truly understand, that he was not just having a break, he was immensely depressed, and in quite the rut. 

Laying back relaxed, he tucked up and closed his eyes, falling asleep rather quickly, and peacefully. All that talking had truly knackered him out. That and the time they had ended up going to bed. It was crazy, the time passed so quickly, he didn’t even realise it was as late or ‘early’ as it was until she pointed out the sun rising behind the curtains, trying to gleam in through the little cracks in the curtains. He had been setting a low vibe for himself, forgetting to open the curtains, shuffling around in his gown, moping and sulking to himself. Hopefully with time, he could get back on his feet. Depression was never an easy battle, it always creeped up on you, especially when you least expected it to. In the happiest moments, could still come the darkest thoughts. It stabbed you right in the back. He of all people knew this well, he suffered and battled with it for most of his lifetime, on and off, having lows and highs. Drugs had pretty much fogged that in the seventies, but afterwards, he had to just persevere. Getting himself into this state would seem merely stupid soon enough, when and if he did get back on his feet and kick off the ground to get work done and swing back into his routine.

It wasn’t until two in the afternoon that there was first a stir. David woke up gently, from his deep, relaxed sleep. One thing he hadn’t been familiar with for a long while. His sleep had been scattered, broken and he spent a lot of the time tossing and turning, sleeping fitfully, or waking up often to nightmares that left him panting, in a cold sheen of sweat. This was the first time in such a long while, and he felt ever so well rested. He sat up and yawned, rubbing his sleepy eyes, stretching out his arms and legs, scratching at his bearded chin with his first thought of the day already; remove this scraggly monstrosity. His first instinct was to have a shower, get cleaned up, and fresh for their trip to the museum, as promised. He got out of bed and grabbed a fresh outfit, a casual shirt and some jeans, before he scooted into the bathroom and got into the shower. 

David usually spent his time in the shower, reflecting on yesterday’s events and planning today’s. But instead, he simply focused and the now, the present, for his own sake. If he were to push out of this god awful position he’d been in, first of all, conquer his mental blockage, fence off the rain clouds, and bring out the sunshine in him, the glorious cheerful man he was known to be. Well not always cheerful, but way more upbeat than this past year had been. It was definitely one of his lowest points asides the height of his drugs, maybe almost, just as bad. Except he had completely reigns over what he did next this time, rather than get more depressed about his debts with the dealers and think about where he’d be getting his next fix. Getting clean was definitely one his greatest, personal achievements. It was a very difficult thing to overcome, the terrible and insatiable addiction that he had once entertained. If it weren’t for his blessing of a son, he’d have never quite made it there, he was sure of it. He cleaned up for himself, but ultimately, for Duncan. When he gained custody, he was already attempting to get out of it all, but failing, until he knew, he had to be the responsible adult, and then he did kick it truly, years maybe, but slowly but surely, he kicked it. 

His last time ever touching the stuff was in the studio in 86’ and even then, beforehand he had been clean years before that. It was a silly relapse when he decided to take it again while writing his song for the film ‘Absolute Beginners’ as titled such. But thankfully, that didn’t go anywhere further that one song and that one time only. Ever since, he had managed to also shake off his terrible alcoholism problems and almost smoking.. almost. He was sure some major damage had already been done but continuing wouldn’t help his cause. Some people did just give up and say ‘Well the damage is already done’ but what was the use in going any further until he grew too sick to recover. Smoking was definitely his comfort, his most difficult vice to ever fully shake, but he had managed to cut right back, now to just turn that last cigarette down and he’d be clean of everything that was holding him down health wise. 

He spent a good amount of time in the shower, thinking through his day plans, before he stepped out and wrapped a towel loosely around his waist, rubbing his hair dry with a smaller hand towel and then starting to get dressed, standing in front of the mirror, with his clean smooth shaven face, admiring the sight of his own chin; he hadn’t seen that in quite some time indeed. 

Amaris woke up when she heard the front door open and close. It was David’s cleaner coming in to start her shift, sifting through the mess and cleaning up what was allowed of her. She started in the kitchen space and would then work her way round, making sure not to touch anything that looked to be in use. David always had a method to his madness, the books upturned on many surfaces of the house, the random scraps of paper, anything that seemed miscellaneous and clutter, was probably there for a good reason. He usually had multiple books going at once, in every room of the house sometimes, and he definitely wouldn’t appreciate losing his page. His mind was clogged enough, let alone remembering each individual number of pages. His cleaner had known him years and seen him right through this rut of his, right before and straight through, back in the day when she used to clean through every room of the house. She understood his need for certain things to be untouched and could not complain, he paid her generously well considering, and helped her out financially when she needed it. He was good to her, and a very kind, humble man, always polite and sweet. It was tough to see him fall down like that, and know little she said would make a direct impact. But every word counted for something, and chipped off the edges, for when he did start to get better, or at least, out of this mess he’d found himself in. 

Amaris slowly rose and got out of bed, starting with cleaning up her face and also making way to take a quick shower. She unfortunately, didn’t have a spare change of clothes handy, so she’d need to make a trip to her house before the museum. But in the meantime she dressed in her available clothes and made her way out the room and downstairs to sit in the lounge and wait for David to wake. “Good Morning Miss.” The cleaner’s voice came as she came shuffling in with her broom, sweeping away. 

“Oh, hello, good morning.” Amaris looked up and saw the cleaner, smiling politely, hands in lap, clocking onto the woman’s business here. 

“So Mr. Jones decided to have company at last?” The cleaner asked quietly, being nosey, brushing at the mantlepiece with a duster. She had not seen anyone in or around this house for months, other than David and perhaps his son, very rarely. He never had visitors anymore, as far as she was aware, or so she thought, until she saw Amaris sat there. She assumed it must’ve been something of an amorous call, he had a few of those but nothing else, what else could it be? He’d been closed off to everyone, and everything as far as she’d noticed.

“Uh-yes.. Why do you ask?” Amaris wondered, feeling a little dim for not catching on, but she assumed someone like him, must have company, with all his friends and such. 

“Oh. He never really has anyone round is all. I guess he’s been quite- well- off character.” The cleaner mentioned quietly, keeping her voice down, she was no gossip, but she did not want to offend him either. He was sweet, ever so sweet, she felt sorry for him, seeing him shuffle around in that dirty old gown with his eyes upon the floor, head down, sighing and moping about. 

“I know, but I think he’ll get better with time. Or I hope he will. He’s a good man. He just needs to be reminded of that.” Amaris mentioned back, her intentions, to lighten him up, were becoming more long term as she had made a friendship with him, and she did not want to see him down either. She had been the first person he had let in all this time, asides the cleaner, who happened to be there anyway, to hear him mutter angrily, or half-heartedly, rant on about anything and everything. 

“Absolutely. So are you a friend of his?” The cleaner agreed, sweeping past her, brushing the coffee table off and collecting the mugs, some still containing half-drank cold and decomposing coffee. It wasn’t the worst she had seen. Like the one time he had let her into his office, to collect the stale mugs, that’d been grim. 

“Yes, a friend. No, I am not sleeping with him.” Amaris said bluntly, putting the cleaner’s other ideas to rest quickly, it could look quite bad as she thought about it, with the lack of company, and then suddenly someone had stayed the night. The question caught her too, the cleaner would’ve assumed a friend, if she thought nothing more of it than that. 

“Oh. No I didn’t mean for it to sound like that.” The cleaner apologised and scooted round the sofa, holding the mugs, sweeping the corners and under the sofa, getting up the dust that had gathered. Sometimes he was so idle, just the odd David sized footstep was all that wasn’t collecting dust. The place was pretty much lifeless, the task to keep it tidy was quite challenging at points, with the little care he had been putting in himself.

“We both got caught up in that storm last night and I couldn’t walk home so I stayed in the guest room.” Amaris told her, lifting her feet when the cleaner sweeped there. 

“It was dreadful last night. I thought my house may flood.” She shivered before she scooted off again into the other room to clean, taking the mugs out.

There came the heavy thuds of footsteps coming down the stairs, and David appeared, coming into the lounge, dressed, hair combed back, looking far more kempt and clean than he had yesterday. He came in and smiled softly, “Good morning, sleep well?” 

“Good morning, Oh yes thankyou, that bed is ever so cosy.” Amaris smiled too, noticing the change and seeing the difference in him already, he seemed more upbeat, hopefully it would last. She did not want to walk away from this and find him back in a mess all over again. She was determined to help him, now she found it almost a duty, a promise. 

“Oh good, would you like anything to drink?” He asked politely, leaning on the doorframe, brushing off his collar as he folded it down, noticing he had forgotten to.

“Um, yes please, do you have any coffee?” She asked, to his amusement, did he have coffee? Well it was his favourite drink, he’d be pretty disappointed if he didn’t have. But she wouldn’t know that. Englishmen.. tea drinkers, stereotypically. He hated the stuff personally, after both a bad experience in his childhood with it and generally, he just preferred coffee massively. 

“Of course, do you have milk and sugar?” He asked, he had his own black with plenty of sugar, but each had their own preference.

“Could I have it black with three sugars please.” She asked and he nodded, going off into the kitchen to make the drinks.


	6. And They Lived.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Last chapter of this short story, as per requested by an anonymous user. -

When David returned he came holstering both drinks in either hand safely, balancing two plates on his forearms daringly, smiling slightly as he came stepping in slowly, coming to sit down next to her, placing the plates down with the mugs. 

“I’m not sure what you prefer on toast so..” 

He had a tray with a selection of toppings, jams, pate, spreads. 

Amaris looked and picked up a jar of strawberry jam, taking up a knife and starting to spread it upon the toast generously, before taking a big bite and sipping her coffee. He opted for a sweeter breakfast himself, going for his favourite, porridge oats with honey, and other syrups, topped with blueberries and raspberries. He was quick to tuck into the meal, which he had made himself for once. His whole aura had shifted since yesterday, he had shaved, dressed up in more than just his over-worn and under-washed bathrobe. His cleaner was silently, and quietly shocked as she swept round them and cleaned up the place. It was mostly maintenance work after the first few weeks of working for him. He had areas he didn’t let her touch, purely for the layout he had. 

“Sarah?”

He called after her and she popped her head round as she’d just disappeared into the hall to continue sweeping.

“Yes, David?”

She looked worried for a moment, his polite tone rattled her because he was usually quite gruff and sometimes he plain ignored her presence as he walked around with his eyes against the ground. It was how he’d been since she started working here. There were odd moments when she got a conversation out of him, but mostly, he only called upon her to fret about something she’d done that she shouldn’t have, or generally, she expected something negative.

“Could you clean out the other rooms too, all of them, please.”

David asked softly, smiling to her, to which she smiled back and nodded.

“I won’t move anything you don’t watch touching.”

He placed his empty bowl down and shook his head.

“I want everything organised, if you would? I don’t mind, it needs doing, I’m going to be using the office space later, so if it’s too much, then at least do the office first, and the studio space. I’ll pay you extra for that, I want it maintained too.”

He said confidently, it was a big step for him, he hadn’t been in there in probably, well, admitting it to himself as it seemed an awfully short time, a year or more already. He’d declined and remained down for that time. There had been so little going on. He’d been so down he’d pushed everyone away, no company, no work, no purpose. 

Sarah seemed really surprised but she nodded eagerly and took in everything he said, going back to her sweeping, at a faster pace, now she knew that she didn’t have to draw out her tasks just to justify the generous wage he paid her. He was fair on the people that came round to do little tasks. Very fair considering the minimum wage he was required to pay them. He almost tripled that. It had been a right task flicking through the endless amounts of applications. He had to find somebody that was good enough, but also unassuming, and not there purely because it was him, to be nosey, or do something else. He didn’t need anyone coming to thieve his possessions, like he’d once had to fire one of his staff for doing. Being so high profile meant the vetting process was rough, and picked them apart quite heavily. So he paid them off for their discretion, their respect of his need for privacy. 

Amaris finished her breakfast and her coffee whilst David was upstairs instructing the cleaner around the rooms he wanted cleaning, even stepping in there for the first time after so long felt good. He was already showing a change in colour, just after this encounter, all he needed was a friend, or somebody to talk to. But most of the friends he already had were in showbiz. He didn’t want the fuss or the gossip from them. He needed normal people, so he could be a normal person, and have none of the other fuss with it. 

“I’m going to head home and change and stuff. What time are we meeting?”

Amaris asked as she collected her coat, slipping on her shoes.

“As soon as you’re ready, here, call me when you’re ready.”  
He produced a little business card, blank with his number scribbled across it. She took it and tucked it into her pocket, smiling and feeling surprised when he suddenly came to hug her, kissing her cheek and opening up the door for her, holding it.

“Thank you, for what you did, and for putting up with me.”

He said in short, for what he felt, he was more than thankful but he couldn’t quite put it into words. He was still wondering how he was still here today, but then, he had her to thank for that. Though he still had progress to make, towards stabilising, he was putting his foot down today, a complete switch of attitude from everything else he’d grown used to over the year. Clearing out his office and studio for use, going out in public, shaving away his matted beard, dressing up. He was making a step towards finding himself again, all was not lost.

-

Hours passed and just after lunchtime, they met up outside of the gallery, as arranged. David had changed into a flashy suit, especially tailored for him by one of his favourite designers, Alexander McQueen. He was late, by twenty minutes. After speaking to her on the phone and arranging for two thirty, he’d ended up there just before three, swiftly approaching her and apologising immediately.

“I’m so sorry, I lost track of time and I… to be quite honest, I couldn’t decide which tie to wear.”

He smiled nervously, he was out in public, wearing shades and a hat to hide his identity somewhat. But people knew him regardless, he’d already been pointed at, and had heads turn on his way down. David rushed Amaris in the door because he didn’t want to be spotted, he’d rather do without the hassle. Especially if the paps showed up. It’d be a big headline for them considering they hadn’t spotted him in a year, he never went out. 

Inside the gallery, it was huge, open spaces plastered in both local, and famous works. His eyes lit up, darting left right and center, he didn’t know quite where to begin but he took Amaris’ hand confidently and guided her towards each piece. 

“Ah. Monet. No wonder the price tag looked enormous.”

He smiled, and lead her round the works one by one, talking enthusiastically about each and every one. Was there a single artist in here he didn’t know? He was explaining his take on the pieces, his favourites, and really getting into it too. Amaris was fascinated, just nodding and occasionally humming in agreement. She only knew some, and even then, she would hardly be able to get a word in, as he rambled away about it all, like he’d been waiting for the opportunity to share it for years. 

“You really know you’re stuff, I mean wow, I’m just.. I’m sorry I’ve been so quiet, I don’t even know what to say, you know so much, I feel small in comparison.”

Amaris laughed when he finally paused, and she got a word in. He beamed at her and shook his head.

“Nonsense, you’ve got a good eye for art. I’m just in my element here, I love the galleries.”

They had made their way round each and every piece in the entire place, David had been tempted to purchase a few but they were all hefty prices. This was a particularly high profile gallery which is why she’d never been in. Even the tickets to visit it were too dire for her average wage. She’d have to justify it somehow, because otherwise, she’d just been tempted but never found the chance to courage up to going in. 

-

Months passed. Their friendship only blossomed, David called her everyday, for the days when he didn’t see her. Telling her all the details, inviting her round to listen to his new project, an album in it’s early stages. He was back to work, and still on track to remain that way. He still had a few moments in between, but he wasn’t going back on a bridge’s edge again. 

“I have a date tonight.”

He sat down in front of her, they had arranged to meet in a local cafe, to have coffee and cake and chat as they usually did. They had their favourite spots, and they were in between galleries, museums and cafes. 

The first thing he said made her grin.

“Wow.. really?”

She beamed, and he nodded, smirking proudly, his first date in a long time. He thought he was too old to date, but just recently, he’d regained his confidence enough to step back out there and search again. He had decided to try online dating, after Amaris’ recommendation, she sat with him and set him up a profile and everything, helping him find his way around it. 

Looks like her handiwork had paid off.

“Yes, at eight, in a rather posh restaurant, oh, I must say..”

David put on a posh accent with a quirked brow, making her giggle.

“Good. You deserve it.”  
“I guess so. She’s really nice, and ugh.. Gorgeous.”

He gushed, smiling to himself, he was clearly very fond of whomever he’d gotten talking to. Which would end up being his wife, of twenty four years. And the true love of his life.

Amaris didn’t see as much of him after that, occasional meetups, but mostly letters, or phone calls. Which lasted hours, they chattered away like best mates, about anything and everything. He kept her informed on his goings, but only in brief terms, privacy and all. He didn’t want to get ahead of himself but...

It had only been about six months since he had started dating, and one morning when she went to fetch her mail, she couldn’t help but notice a particularly fancy looking envelope. She took it to her coffee table and kicked back, ripping it open delicately, and slipping a card out, an invitation.   
To a wedding. His wedding. 

\- Finished -


End file.
